I hate you, Jason Shiell

I've already officially had it with spring training. I saw the first game, I saw the first Sox-Yankees game, and now I'm done with watching it until it's played for real. Although, to be honest, there were a few instances where I thought perhaps these games DO count

#1. Four stolen bases? Whole teams go through the entire month getting 4 stolen bases in total. Players don't tend to steal much in the spring, because the games don't count enough to make the injury risk worth it. You could make an argument that fringe players need to do it to showcase their basestealing ability to help them get a job, but Gabe Kapler stealing 2 bases in 2 innings was a little overkill. He's got a guaranteed spot, he was stealing because it was against the Yankees.

#2. The media circus was incredible. They had three cameras set up on the outfield wall, which according to Sox broadcasters has never happened in the Sox spring training stadium. Before game time there were crews from all over the place milling about, asking people retarded questions about whether the rivalry had been kicked up a notch this winter.

#3. People camped out for standing room only tickets the night before. Scalpers were getting 80 bucks a seat outside. Doesn't that sound a little ridiculous? The Sox-Yankees rivalry seems to be coasting on its own momentum lately, there's really been very little to perpetuate it. It's like people are passionate about it because they SHOULD be, which hopefully will die down soon. Watching the game on TV is bad enough, camping out for tickets to see two innings of recognizable people playing is just plain sad.

All right, so the game itself. Not a really great game for the Sox by any means, losing 11-7. However, the blame for the Sox loss goes squarely to two pitchers who let in 10 of the 11 runs and should be hunted down like animals. Let's take a quick look at some of the interesting performances

GREAT Performances

Bronson Arroyo: 3 innings pitched with one hit, he still faced only 9 though because of a nice 5-4-3 double play ball he threw in the third. He only struck out one guy, but the kid still looked really good out there. First, he's got a nice changeup to go along with his slider and fastball, which he'll need if he wants to start. Second, he only threw 21 pitches, and this was all against the Yanks best players, not the scrubs they trotted out later. I don't get how this guy was such a failure for the Pirates, he's pitched a perfect game in the minors for us and dominated major league hitters every time he faces them for us. I love the guy.

Jose Contreras: Well, great for the Sox. 2 innings pitched, 5 hits, 4 earned runs. Also he gave up a home run to POKEY FRIGGIN REESE. I don't care how well he does against the Detroits and Devil Rays of the MLB world, the man is absolutely horrible when it comes to pitching against decent teams. NY can shuffle the rotation to make sure he doesn't face us all they want, eventually he's going to have to.

Tony Clark: Words cannot express how much this man angers me. Today he had 1 less home run than he hit ALL SEASON for us. His three hits all chipped and wore away at the already tattered and ulcer-filled lining of my soul. Today that man took between 3-4 months off my life. Is it something in the water in New York? I just don't get it.

Good Performances

Brian Daubauch: Went 1/2 and struck out spectacularly for his out. He's currently the frontrunner for the 25th man slot, although Dave McCarty and his 84 MPH heater and 10 home run potential should not be discounted. I'd really like to see Daubauch come back, if only for sentimental reasons.

Mariano Rivera: What the hell is wrong with this guy? He threw an inning and made every single hitter he faced look avsolutely silly. As much as I despise and hate him, it's really really difficult not to also respect the hell out of this guy.

Unholy Bad performances

Derek Jeter: Someone explain to me why Jeter's still at shortstop? Seriously. Gape Kapler hit a fairly easy grounder to Jeter, but not ridiculously easy. If Jeter had missed it, it probably wouldn't have been an error. However, Jeter then wound up, fired, and threw the ball about 10 feet short of first base. It was the worst throw I've ever seen him make, and he's made some bad ones. How big a team player can this guy really be if, knowing full well that he's a Godawful defensive shortstop and Rodriguez is a gold-glove winning one, he didn't offer to play third and let A-Rod play short?

Mark Bellhorn: 3 times up, 3 strikeouts. Not only did he get the hat trick, but he also did it in nine pitches. AND he was swinging every time. It was the worst three plate appearances in a game I have EVER seen, it almost beats out Bret Boone for "worst offensive showing ever" (Last Year Boonie had a game where he went 0-5 with 4 strikeouts and an inning ending double play with a man on third. The bat he was holding that night belongs in the hall of fame)

Performances that made me seriously consider building a time machine to go back in time to stab the player as an infant to prevent him from ever stepping foot on the mound in a Red Sox uniform

I officially completely and utterly hate Jason Shiell. After Contreras got roughed up badly and Arroyo was done schooling Yankees hitters, Shiell sauntered out with this look on his face, like "I'm going to single handedly erase any memories of my last game where I immediately let in 2 runs to blow the lead for the Sox" And boy-howdy, did he ever. I inning, 6 earned runs, 2 home runs, and to make sure you people don't think I'm being unfairly harsh to the lad, 2 strikeouts. He now has an ERA of 36. Pitchers like Jason Shiell neccesitate some kind of mulligan rule in baseball, perhaps for 3 earned runs. "Well, the only pitcher we've got left is Jason Shiell, and it's the bottom of the ninth with a 3 run lead, so we'll just take a mulligan and go to extra innings rather than have this mutant scumbag immediately blow the game for us". I always make jokes about a hitter having a good day and driving in 5 runs in one plate appearance, I know this is physically impossible but I bet Shiell is going to find a way to allow it to happen. He has officially been designated my Official Pitcher to Direct Irrational Hatred At. You're safe for now, Reynaldo Garcia.

In other Sox-related news:

* El Duque has re-signed with the Yankees for a million base salary and quite a few incentive clauses. The Sox had also been interested in him, however it's going to be 2-3 months before he's in shape to be pitching, he's 38, and, oh yeah, he sucks. Postseason notwithstanding, the man is barely mediocre, and with 6 decent starting pitchers we don't need him.

* Speaking of starting pitcher, BK Kim is apparently being somewhat murky about his current health, saying his back hurts a lot but still pitching, and alternately saying his shoulder really hurts or that it feels fine. Remember, it's his shoulder that gave him so much trouble from late September on last year, so this could be a problem. Hopefully it's one of those things that just goes away over spring training, like A-Rod's neck problems last year

* Nomar and Manny will be hitting 4th and 3rd, respectively. This lineup switch is something stat heads have been clamoring for for a few years now, the logic being that Nomar hits a lot of doubles, which left 1st base open for Manny to be intentionally walked. Also, now Nomar can steal more and Manny will start seeing better pitches. I like it, hopefully it'll stick for the regular season and help out the offense a bit

* Maybe you already heard about this, it's kind of old news, but apparently Curt Schilling doesn't like having home runs he's given up being thrown back in his face, even if it's in a joking, innocent, and somewhat stupid way like Kevin Millar did. I'm not sure what to make of this. Obviously Schilling wasn't trying to hit him. Having said that, he A) should have told Varitek he was going to do it and B)probably didn't need to. I love that this guy is going to be the clubhouse leader that our team desperately DESPERATELY needs, however throwing at your own guys with no explanation isn't the way to go about it. I know he's got great control, but he could have put Millar out for awhile with that stupid pitch, and like him or not, we need Millar. Apparently somehow this was all to prove that come crunch time, Schilling's got his teammate's backs and he's not afraid to give some retribution, however personally I've gotta say that was a pretty dumb-ass way to do it.

* Last but not least, John Henry Williams died at age 35 today from leukemia. A part of me is obviously sad that the 35 year old son of Ted Williams died. Having said that, the much larger bulk of me doesn't care a great deal, seeing as how this is the same sicko who had his dead dad cryogenically frozen and convinced his senile alive dad to wear a Hitters.com baseball hat instead of a Red Sox hat for the 99 All-Star game at Fenway park. He also turned Ted Williams into a small business of his own, having thousands of bats and gloves signed to be auctioned off at insanely high prices. So yes, it's obviously a shame that he died so young, however we didn't lose a great baseball icon or anything.